Got Benefits? A Job vs A Career - My Thoughts on Relationships

I’m an advocate for truth so let’s be real, relationships are like employment. There is a vacant spot in your life that needs to be filled and you search for the best candidate whose skill set meets your requirements. Regardless if you are accepting applications or applying for a position, there are two types of employment: a job and a career. The determining factor behind whether you want a job or a career is the dedication and sacrifice you are willing to exhibit in your work.

The “job” mentality in a relationship is: what can you do for me? This type of relationship is bound to be short lived because it has no substance, just like a dead end job. You don’t respect your employer (mate) and little do they know, you are applying for new positions everyday (on the prowl for a new playmate). This job (relationship) isn’t anything extraordinary; it’s just something (someone) to do in the interim. You show up late and leave early. Pretty soon, even the weekly consolation of a check doesn’t outweigh the monotony of it all. Similarly, the carnal pleasures of life won’t sustain a real relationship and you’re back where you started, accepting applications.

Then there’s the “career” frame of mind. The key distinction between a job and a career is longevity. Just as you ascend the corporate ladder rung by rung, a healthy relationship goes through stages as you work towards the final plateau of a serious commitment.

In the article, A Job Vs. A Career: Deciding What You Really Need, Cynthia McMahon says that a career, “provides opportunities for advancement, allows you to challenge yourself and nurture your personal growth, and provides intrinsic satisfaction with what you do”. The same can be said for a real relationship. As you grow with your mate, you become more aware of your character flaws which can reveal themselves at the most inopportune moments. Self actualization is the intrinsic growth of what is already in you. Challenge yourself to change, not for your mate, but for you. Realize that becoming a better person will lend itself to all your different positions in life. Improving yourself will advance your status at work and in your relationship.

Another essential aspect of healthy relationship is the concept of being invaluable. There are numerous goals that need to be met in your employer’s corporation (your mate’s life). To establish yourself in the corporation, you must demonstrate a passion that no one can imitate or challenge because otherwise, you’re dispensable. A relationship (career) is a commitment to a goal. You will have bad days and you will face challenges, but nothing in this world worth having is easy to maintain. When it comes to reaching an objective, don’t manage the metric, manage the process. Stay on your career (relationship) path and expect the inevitable obstructions. Just have the stick-to-itiveness to work through your issues. Having a real relationship (career) requires some overtime every now and then.